I am still embarrassed about spelling "division" incorrectly on my own damned blog. I'm an idiot, and if you spotted it before and didn't think to tell me, you're a cuntfuckingballsackface. I get excited about shit and miss words or letters or characters, and I nearly always start excited conversations mid-sentence as I deem it sufficient to start it in my head first. English second language, yo.
1) I politely told married dad to quit being an idiot and not fuck up the goodness he has around him. I doubt he thought twice about it other than to maybe consider that he got let off lightly. I'm many things, but Married Dad Thief is not one of those things.
2) I'm hanging out with a pretty cool dude. Mutual friends have been trying to set us up for ages which made us avoid each other all the more, but we went to dinner and watched The King of Kong and realised that we're pretty fucking hilarious. We hung out in a park and I kicked dandelions. We traipsed through a rainforest singing the themesong to Super Mario Bros. level 1 and both shifted to level 2 as soon as we got to jumping rocks over falls. We wrote "failed" on some rich kid's hand-drawn Learner plate and made future plans to burn down a thatched fence. He's very thin. It took me a while to realise that I can't force-feed the guy and taper jeans aren't always a choice. No clingy. Just hangy. Alright.
3) I am severely missing my best friend in the whole wide world.
4) I have rad friends. I am, in comparison, a pretty shit one. HOWEVER. If you're in my house, I will look after you. This makes me happy. I am, after all, a gent.
Don't I look the scholar with my scholarly template?
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17 comments:
You certainly are a gent. And hell, I think you'd scrub up nice in a tux too.
For what it's worth, I didn't notice the typo. And I start sentences midway through as well, for much the same reasons.
High five for that.
It's alright. I start relationships three hours from the end.
As long as I've spoken to you, I don't know who your best pal is and that makes me kinda sad. I'm probably just being daft.
Crap, I didn't even notice the spelling.
King Of Kong is amazing! The haircut/tie selection on the villain in that movie is top notch.
Any guy that knows the theme song to the second level of Mario is A-Ok in my book.
My book is an awesome book, by the way.
Cool blog, you certainly have a way with words.
I will link you on my page *insert thumbs up*
Amy: I think the only tux I'd ever be able to fill would be that little dude from Fantasy Island. That doesn't really arouse me, and I don't wear things that don't arouse me.
Dan: While Mish and Jerkface are local best friends, my SupraBombBiggityBallsackBFF is Tina. I rarely talk about her because I see her maybe once a year. Despite that, time disappears when we catch up. I'd steal foetuses for her.
Shells: Good!
Erik: Billy Mitchell is a cunt, and Steve Weibe deserves delicious whores smothered in Billy Mitchell's hotwing sauce thrown at him forevermore. You remember that old bird defending the Q Bert title and how she died and they did a memorial shot of her? Some dude in the cinema yelled, "Oh! Fuck! Noooo!" It was brilliant. As for your book, your book is GOSPEL to me. Seriously, you and I go so way back that I really do ask myself WWED? when I'm about to do something stupid and public. You rule at life.
Tim: Mate, I have no idea who you are but thanks for the approval rating. I have been waiting eagerly for the last 10 years for multiple thumbs up my way. Rock.
I was linked to your blog through Urban Solitude. *insert metal hand gesture*
Tim: If Mish vouches for you, then ok. She hasn't vouched yet, and if she doesn't... well, who the fuck am I? *robot*
I am sure she will vouch once I serenade her with some NKOTB classics.
Tim: You may not need vouching, after all. I'm Marky Mark's Funky Mail-Order Bunch. He just doesn't know it yet but me love him long time.
Then you will be pleased to know that NKOTB are planning a reunion.
I am so excited I plan to get a 'flat top' hairstyle in celebration.
Yes, I vouch.
How on earth were you spelling 'division' before?
Also why is there no mention of: 5) The ridiculous saga of DignityPants?
Tim: Very pleased, but not as pleased as I was when I found out BOTH Coreys were coming back to do Lost Boys 2. Shit yeah, buoy!
Mish: I spelt it "divison". Like venison, but nowhere near as delicious.
No mention of Ronald "Greeceman" Curry because that would be indulging him, and despite the fact that I am indeed indulging him by acknowledging your comment and his existence, I do it only to prove a point. In paranoia lies irony. His, anyway. I think, also, it's only a saga according to him - I have said my peace.
Please let this blog never, ever die.
P.S. I hope I'm not the only one that gets ironic emails out of all this shit.
Both Coreys is obviously a reference to both Haim and Feldman? Lost Boys 2...that is a must see.
I wonder what ever happened to Martika? I had the hots for her big time back in the days.
Mish: Haha, I'm surprised I haven't heard a peep. My blogs never die, they just move around and hibernate every so often.
Tim: Are there any other Coreys that matter? Jeez. I heard Martika was deported and mysteriously disappeared whilst on a fishing trip with nondescript, trenchcoated characters.
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